im in love with you

good luck with shooting the moon (:

life is unexpected.

sometimes.

things come easy.

sometimes.

they are difficuly.

and hard to live with (:

but. sometimes there is that special someone.

that makes it all worth while.

the someone that makes you bend miles over backwards.

the someone that you will climb over mountians to see.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

A B C D E F G... stop!

H I J K L M N O ... start!

Q R S T U V.. peeling banana's

W X Y.. starting a new life.

Z!

opening your eyes.

1 2 3

im flying through the air.

im in love with you

CarlyCatherine

love me for my heart

im starting to think..

this isnt ReAL!

is it just fantasy or.. reality..?

am i dreaming?

or am i awake?

answer my questions ..

and ill be

yours

FOrevER

i hate.

that.

i love you.

RanDom: thoughts,

laughter,

words,

and every thing you say..

makes me smile (:

lets write a fairytale together

plan out our lives ..

peice by peice.

im 25% itailian... does that make me more sexier?

or.. do you love me.. for my heart <3

CarlyCatherine

finished.

me.

Carly.

Life is

unsettle.

life is full of surprises.

sometimes.

i wish.

i could

know.

who i am

and know my life..

already.

just have my whole entire life..

every thing i ha vent experienced

on video camera.

i could watch it over and over.

replay the best parts.

and erase the bad.

Im finished.

CarlyCatherine

just for dignity

I'm feeling.

happy.

I'm feeling.

open.

I'm feeling ,

that my shield is fading away.

and. suddenly..

I'm figuring out..

that people are starting to care about me.

we can be different then who we appear to be.

sometimes.

murderers.

can have great hearts.

sometimes.

heart breakers.

just need someone to love.

and sometimes..

CarlyCatherine

just needs a paper to write on.

Some times.

CarlyCatherine.

just needs love.

i just need.

protection.

when I'm lonely .

and home alone.

i scream at the top of my lungs!

just for dignity.

CarlyCatherine

A SHINY NEW TOY

hurt.

used as some kind of

TOY.

but. I'm the shiny new

TOY.

the one that every boy wants.

to hold.

to play with .

to touch.

to carry.

I'm a new subject!

but.

then there becomes a

PROBLEM.

there becomes another new toy.

one new thing that no one has seen before.

they cant wait to get they're hands

on it.

Then i am just placed back

in the box. with all the other "OLD TOYS"

i am now. in the box.

with all the other broken hearts.

stolen.

shipped across the sea.

finally. some little boy

picks me up.

dust's me off and smiles at me.

then. he finally realizes.

that i am HIS toy.

then all the other kids start wanting me again.

just because someone else found me.

then they get jealous.

of my beauty of how much this guy loves me.

then i once again

become the shiny new toy.

the one that everyone wants to love, to hold, to touch, and to play with.

but they wont stand a chance.

because the boy that found me. Loves me.

and found me.

picked me.

out of all the other toys

he could have chosen.

he liked me for me.

and not just because i was a shiny new toy.

he thought i was special.

he didn't care that i wasn't a new subject.

he loved me for the person i was.

and i didn't have to be a shiny new toy.

for him to figure that out.

CarlyCatherine

death. and immortality

life is hard.

death is much simpler.

i do not want to rot in the ground when i die.

you. are my grave.

instead of rotting inside a cold

hard piece of cement.

i want to be with you.

i want to still hear your voice whispering in my ear.

i don't want to die.

i want to face my life's battle.

i want to be able to be the first person

who figured out how to become immortal.

and stay that way.

but i wish to not grow older.

i wish to stay or become 16.

i wish you could be

immortal

with me

then we could live together.

and never die.

i wish i was a rock.

could experience all the different lives that i have seen.

if the walls could talk.

they would tell me all the stories

they have seen.

CarlyCatherine

open.

open doors.

sun. is beaming into daylight.

give me all your silence.

lets not speak words.

lets communicate with just our eyes.

chills.

start at my feet .

..

then go up all the way up..

to my spine.

then i make a smile.

a little grin comes out the side of my cheek.

i put my fingers through my hair.

I'm asking you...

all kinds of questions.

i love the way you speak.

you put love songs in my dreams.

my heart has started.

after years of waiting.

all the cobwebs

and dusty engines

are working up again.

just for you.

i make a smile.

twirling my fingers around in the dust.

i want some answers to my questions.

rapping and twisting my washed.

and partially wet hair around.

my fingers.

singing.

actually shouting.

random lyrics to the song.

CarlyCatherine

one organ.

some times.. you get exactly what you want.

but when you think that its exactly

what you wanted. when its not.

you end up hurting people.

but then.

you feel.

insanely selfish

and you disappoint some of the people that you love

most.

and then your just like a fly.

that's stuck in the spiders web.

kicking and screaming to get out.

but your stuck in the worst mess.

ever possible.

i am only one person.

same parts as any other girl.

but something inside me is special.

one thing that only i. have.

everyone has it.. but doesnt use it as well as i do.

i have one thing inside of me.

that cares..

about everyone.

that expresses all of my true feelings.

that makes me confess.

this organ inside of me.

is called.

my.

heart.

it beats faster and faster.

whenever you come close to me.

CarlyCatherine

i am my own person

SINKING! INTO MY BED. THINKING OF ALL MY THOUGHTS AND DREAMS INTO MY HEAD AT THE SAME TIME. I COULD JUST SIT HERE IN MY BED FOR HOURS. JUST THINKING AND STARING AT THE WALL.

IM OVER IT. WAY WAY OVER IT. JUST LET ME BE.

LET ME HAVE MY own HEART BREAK. LET ME LEARN MY own LESSON.

YOU'VE MADE YOUR CHOICE. NOW LET ME MAKE MINE.

MY heart WILL BELONG TO MYSELF NOW.

I WANT TO BE FREE AND CUT OUT ALL THE LITTLE PEICES OF DRAMA. LIKE A SNOWFLAKE.

AND JUST FILL MY MIND WITH HAPPINESS.

no more. NO MORE.. tears, hate, and sorrow.

I AM MY OWN PERSON.

CarlyCatherine

untitles

floating.

getting rid of all bad thoughts.

blocking the bad.

inviting the good.

holding your breath.

just floating in the pool.

just getting all of those bad memories out of your head.

leaving.

wet.

soaked.

thinking.

clear.

remembering.

oh no.

all of the bad..

STOP!

STOP thinking about that.

but i just cant.

i just cant forget about.. what happened to my heart.

and why.. there is a cheap bandage on it.

pounding my head.

no. no. no.

wet. cold.

chills.. running down my body.

one by one.

two by two.

three by three.

running my fingers through my hair.

shaking my head.

back and forth.

smiles.

then i look at you. and frown.

you've hurt me.

now i cant forget it.

I'm done with you.

you are erased from my mind..

like a five year old's toy.

gone and moving on to something new.

painting the white roses red.

and painting the red roses white.

over and over.

not stopping.

please. forgive me.. but I'm through with you.

CarlyCatherine

life is a big puzzle.

life is like a puzzle.

every piece fits together in its own way.

every little piece makes us who we are today (:

the change is good

. I'm changing mine.

my life..

and making every puzzle piece not fit.

i want the pieces that repel.

i want my life..

to be a surprise.

not programed.

i want answers.

not suggestions.

i want a freedom.

not jail.

i want love.

not war.

i do not want hate.

i want my life.

to be like a heart shaped

bell.

that jingles.

when it is lifted up..

twisted around.

or just worn on a necklace.

i want to look down at my life.

replay... the happy moments

and pause the mistakes.

i guess ill go.

I'm like a speaker.

you can turn me down.

you can turn me off.

you can turn me up.

but i only go to a max.

then i stop and say no.

you can twist my nob..

i want to laugh.

for hours.

and not know why i am laughing.

i want to dream..

of happy things..

visions..

people.

i want to find him.

the one i love the most..

sometimes i wonder...

is he even out there? the one who i am going to end up with?

go get your head in strait.

think strait.

focus on the negative..

then you will be so depressed..

that you will have to think positive.

i can see.. with my eyes closed..

better than with my eyes open.

tell me ..

that you love me.. and that you cant possibly live without knowing I'm alive.

life is a puzzle. except all my pieces are missing.

CarlyCatherine

today, tomorrow, and the next day

a hand full of mistakes.

i have had.

but you know what?

I've been thinking..

if i hadn't made.. any of those mistakes..

i wouldn't be who i am today!

which is who i am.

Carly Catherine bartosiewicz.

one 13 teenage...girl

There are a hand full of people that have gone through the same things.. I've gone through.

all of the trials,

all of the tears,

all of the anger,

all of the hate.

all of that is gone.

every little bit.

erased out of my mind...

I'm clearing my thoughts..

and putting new ones in.

painting a new picture.

starting a new day..

printing a new piece of paper..

typing one sentence at a time..

looking and seeing things clearly.

being a little rebellious..

being a little phys co.

but believing in myself.

and who i am today, tomorrow, and the next day..

dancing.

feeling the hair on my head.

brushing off my face.

shaking all of the stress off my body..

to be clean and pure.

I'm believing in myself... who i am today, tomorrow and the next day (:

and thats why im dreaming it!

swim.

feel the water.

all of the droplets.

into one big pool.

of happiness.

of laughter.

of screaming little kids.

while you are just floating..

like a feather in the sky..

except your under water.

underneath all of the stress..

escaping it all.

I'm pushing you away from my life.

you don't need me.

don't be the one that crushes my heart.

sun burnt.

all red.

like the sun.

the sun loves me to much.

i want to escape this earth.

and blast off!

finding my own world..

to live by myself in.

and live with my best friends.

and be able to create new things...

and find countries.

name creatures..

and when I'm upset.

i can run for miles!

without anyone stopping me (:

that is my dream..

but its impossible.

that's why I'm dreaming it!

in my life- written by carly bartosiewicz

in my life..

there are struggles that im facing..

in my world there is magic in the air..

some place i will find a destination..im looking for the things that ive been missing..

in my life..

there are trials that im facing

in my life there are mountians that im climbing..

but i know that im going to change it

and now im just going to leave this place and go.

pack my bags... looking for that something...

i have to find the way back home.

breath.

I'm in a big box.

shielding off everything.

my heart has been injured and now it is healing with a cheap bandage.

trust?

i cant believe i caught you.

because now.

I'm going to have to let you go.

sorry.

but I'm leaving you.

today.

I'm sick of adds.

logo's and slogans.

breath.

just breath.

for hours just sit at the wall and breath.

don't think about anything.

just think about breathing.

inhale.

...

exhale.

he,oho,he,oho,

sit in the corner of your closet.

just thinking about what you said.

and what they did.

hide.

under your bed.

like a little child.

scream.

into your pillow.

dream.

happy thoughts.

walk.

for miles.

let it go.

let all of it go.

just let it go!

and breath.

No entrence

no entrances.
no doors.
no windows.
my head is in the clouds.. yet there is no clouds.
blocked.
no one can hurt me.
punch. angry.
slam open!
Let me out!
i am coming out..
seeing a whole new world around me.
like a new born taking its first real breath.
want to know why? my head is in the clouds?
because.. i am PAINTING the sky..
and painting the sunset... pink and yellow and orange..
adding every detail to the sky as i want.. so i can enjoy my life in it.
the in crowd?
no im random.
im not going into what everyone makes me..
im standing outside the box!
a deep hole.
is in my heart.
im missing something.
a deep hole.
outside my house.
jump in?
ill see whats in there.
i want to fall down a hole.. and find my wonderland.
with rainbows for doors.
Plug me in.
im charging..
my battery is low.
but your love will make me fill all the way to the top.
dont use me.
im not just my body.
im also: my heart, my personality, my eyes.
i can be 1,000,000 different people.
all at the same time.
for you i would be one person.
and stay with you forever.

i love you

stop my muscles.

freeze my blood.

cracks.

in the pavement.

jumping over them.

dancing.

smiling

laughing

call me bipolar?

heal me.

love me.

need me.

i am flying far away.

over mountains.

on my broom stick.

call me crazy?

tease me.

kick me.

kiss me.

summer is here.

love is in the air.

I've made new friends.

I've lost friends.

etc.

etc.

etc.

I'm fragile don't punch me or leave bruises on my skin

heal me.. don't break me.

just be OK?

OK?

yes?

no?

maybe?

sure?

positive?

absolutely!

Go Green.

Go Blue.

Go pink?

that's what I'm doing.

follow trends? no i have my own style.

believe? no. i have my own life.

Santa Claus?

no. palm trees!

love.

one word.

LOVE?

HATE?

promise is a strong word?

do you really mean it?

questions.. questions.. when am i going to get answers?!! people speak now or forever hold your peace..

ill give you my heart. lock it up safe. put it in your pocket. around your neck. what is this world coming to? it takes more energy to love then to kill.. why are you guys so lazy?

stop killing.. and do the harder part. L

O. i want to escape.

with butterflies covering my body V.

E. with non selfish thoughts.

L= look babe.

O= oh you are beautiful

V=very in love with you.

E= can Everyone get this chance that i have?

peace. be with you. let me be with you and let me change your life.. tick

TOCK!

break the time in half.

stop counting.

look into my eyes.

"i love you"

TIME FREEZE.MISTAKES UNMAKE YOURSELF.

i am angry.

like hatie's

i am happy like madusa. which is not so happy...

hate is a strong word.

so is the word heart.

do you have one?

i am filling my head with rap music.

i want to be free.

and be mad for once in my life.

i want to be free.

flutter like a bird.

betraying? NOT MY THING!

cheating? NOT MY THING!

i want to fly away.

just run for miles.

jump over cliffs.

fly over bridges.

skip trials.

break heart breaks.

i want to roll in a puddle of mud.

this isnt working.

make it stop.

i wish i was a robot.

and and some kind of an off button.

and then when i was ready to face the world. i would have an ON button.

Dear sky-

make a storm for me

make it rain.

BUCKETS.

so i can go in the middle of the street and sit there.

getting drenched.

i want to sit and think in the

...

CENTER OF THE EARTH

i want time to freeze.

so i could go up to all my mistakes and unmake them.

i want my life to rewind.

then fast forward and extra 3 years.

I want to ESCAPE

from any kind of problems.

TIME FREEZE. MISTAKES UNMAKE YOURSELF.

I want to sink. but stay living

the greatest day (:

Hugs kisses and more.

i love life.

drama.

heartbreaks.

why did i do this?

there is this guy.. that makes me laugh and smile (:

there is this guy.. that makes me get goosebumps.(:

there is this guy.. that wants me. to hold me.

My world has no worries.

No hate..

everything that i touch turns into water.

except for the things i love the most.

i want to go swimming and sink to the bottom of the pool.

sit there and think for hours.

just sit there like a fish. holding my breath

...

forever.

never.

ever.

come up.

but still be alive.

I want to sink. But keep living.